Impossible days

Ixempra was given to me Oct. 29, IV at the cancer center. I started the oral drug -Xeloda - the next day, two pills twice a day with meals. Sunday, Oct. 31, the Ixempra "hit". The best way I can explain is that I had "instant arthritis" in every joint and could hardly move. I had horrible pain. I have been fortunate not to have any nausea or vomiting and that continues, but I am having difficulty with constipation (mostly because the pain drugs I take have this side effect). So I have been eating prunes, drinking more fluids, and taking fiber pills. (please don't send me your cures for this side effect - I have access to them all, remember I am a nurse??) The oncologist changed my pain pills to an even stronger pill, and I take it more frequently. I am still having pain from the hand surgery I had Oct. 4th, so I can be very short tempered, just ask Marlin. I can now relate to people who have stated that some impossible days, they got through them one hour at a time, one minute at a time, one second at a time - thanking God for the blessings in their life.
I did not go to Topeka this week, but worked via computer/internet for a few minutes at a time. Enough to keep up email and responding to students' questions. I am improving each day and I hope to get to Topeka this week. Marlin will have to drive me, cause I don't think I can drive 3 hours by myself. Marlin has been wonderful in caring for me, making sure I took meds on time and keeping me nourished and hydrated.
My routine weekly blood tests showed that my white cell count is very low, and so I should stay away from crowds, wash hands, etc, as this means I am more susceptible to infections.
I will continue to take the oral chemotherapy pills this week and next week, I'll have the week "off" before Thanksgiving. I will begin the "round" again Nov. 19th with the IV drug and two weeks of the pill.
I am thinking that I should include a verse on patience, but I am too impatient to look one up, so "God give me patience and give it to me now!"
I am thankful for each of the blessings provided to me.
Blessings to you -
Love to you -
Ellen